Here's to you, 2009

I don't know about you, but I will be welcoming 2010 with open arms. Wide open arms. I specifically remember my feelings towards ringing in 2009. I sat at home on winter break for five weeks, and dreaded the turn of the new year. I wanted to hang on to 2008 forever. 2008 meant I'd be forever 21, 2008 meant I'd stay in college forever, 2008 meant that the real world would hold on for just a little bit longer.

But then it was time for 2009. I wasn't excited about this new year, I had grown up knowing that 2009 was an important year because it was the year I would graduate college. And come midnight on December 31st meant that my graduation date was that much closer, the real world was looming.

I remember that New Year's Eve. It was one of my favorite. Everyone was home, and by everyone I mean all my friends from home were in one location. Although a few of us scattered for that particular night, we had been together for a joyous holiday season. We gathered again on this night, at Lauren's house, with the boys, with the girls, and I felt okay because nothing makes me feel better than my friends from home. And what a night it was. Someone made the most delicious jello shots I've ever had, complete with peaches in each one (my favorite fruit)! Rock Band was set up near the TV and since I was such a fabulous drummer we just kept the songs coming all night. There were probably other games being played, in fact I know there were games being played, has anyone met us?! Catch Phrase was probably circling and perhaps some Scene It. It was a great way to ring in the new year, 2009, which I utterly dreaded.

Now, a whole year has come and gone since that fun night. But the truth is, I couldn't feel more different. As much as I was afraid of 2009, holding on to 2008 until the very last second, I have been letting 2009 slip away for some time now. I'm very anxious for a new year, a fun year, a whole new decade that is upon us, and I couldn't be more ready for it.

Let's recap. I mean, 2009 started out fantastically. I was happy, healthy, young. The year started, as it always does, with my birthday. I turned 22 and got snowed in with my sister and watched the Giants. Doesn't get much better than that! (Well, I mean it does.) Anyway. Two days later I flew out to California. CALIFORNIA! Who doesn't want to go to Cali for a little fun in the sun, a little sight seeing, and seeing two of my very good friends. I mean, Los Angeles? I want to move there. Doesn't everyone want to move to California at some point in their life? Well I REALLY want to. Anyway, that trip was amazing. January came and went smoothly. The rest of the year wasn't so fabulous. February came and went with no major mishaps, then came March. March sucked, as March always does. This time it sucked even more. March was full of tears, laughs, fights, on again off again, stress, and mainly heartbreak. But with all bad comes some good, and I flew out to Toronto Canada on a very spur of the moment decision to leave reality behind. I saw the sights of Toronto, spent time with friends, and of course watched some baseball.

The rest of 2009 was a complete roller coaster ride. Up and down and being jerked around left to right. The highs were really high and the drops were really far down. The highest point came May 17th. The commencement ceremonies started around noon, both in Queens and in Springfield. My sister and I were graduating college. (Now that I think about this, despite being the highest of the highs, it was also a low point since we had to divide the family in half. Half drove north, a few drove south, but we both had the love and support of someone at our graduations. I just wish I could have been with my sister, and she could have been with me.) Nonetheless, I accomplished and defeated college. I graduated with Red Storm pride from St. John's, the place I grew to love and adore, to learn from and to appreciate. I thought I'd be saying goodbye to St. John's forever, until the roller coaster took another turn up. My phone rang a few days after graduation and it was someone offering me a graduate assistant position at St. John's. Two more years on my own in New York City and a Master's degree were coming right up. My future was looking bright, and I was happy as could be.

The lows came, but the support was nice, I appreciated all the advice and ears that listened to me (thank you). Then, on May 29th, while my apartment was empty and my bedroom was empty except for two green walls and a big pink bed, tears flowed. My lonely laptop sat on the floor and echoed music while I thought. Memories flashed, but my future called. My future filled with question marks, hope, and faith.

I woke up the next morning, in a daze. Put the last of my belongings in my car, said some goodbyes, and left my apartment, my first real home away from home. Two years full of memories in the place that forced me to grow up. I turned the music up in the car, loud enough so that I could not hear myself cry. Yeah life throws you curves, but you learn to swerve.

The end of my undergraduate life, the end of my toxic relationship and toxic roommates, the end of living on my own was more of a beginning, a fresh start, a new outlook on life. I moved home, ran to my friends for support, and told myself I'd live it up the summer. I truly believe that what does not kill us can only make us stronger. I worked to keep myself busy, my mind occupied and my bank account full, and I loved my job. I cried, but I also laughed. I even went on a few dates and crushed on a few guys. I made trips to and from New York many times, keeping my school friends close even though we lived far. I went to a few graduation parties and really tried to make the best of my 22nd summer. 

When the air started to get heavy with humidity, I started to pack back for New York. I found an apartment with two very close friends and as the roller coaster climbed higher, we moved in and started school and work. The semester really came and went, with a trip to the World Series included. There is no escaping the drama and it feels like 2009 was quite the year for drama. I stood up for myself on more than one occasion, proving that I will not be played a fool anymore. There were more highs than lows now, and my focus really became on school and work. I was happy. I am happy. I learned that being independent is far more important that finding someone to depend on. I realized once again how special my friendship with the girls from home is, and how strong it is, just like each one of them. The first snow fell on the fall foliage and this meant that the holidays were upon us. My family grew bigger with happy, healthy babies, and Thanksgiving was a time to reflect on all that I have and how grateful I truly am. Christmas was especially fun too, and that leads me to where I am...right now.

Right now, thinking back on 2009. It certainly made me a stronger person, it certainly had its share of tears. I am wishing it away with only strong memories of the happy times. At least I made it through 2009 with a solid head on my shoulders. I am more than happy to see 2010 approach quickly. I am more than happy to see 22 behind me and in a few days will welcome age 23. 2009 was a wild one, so I am here awaiting 2010 with open arms. With wide open arms. Adios to 2009, and welcome 2010, I've been waiting for you.

Liz